Finding Reason: A Letter to Encourage a Coworker Who Is Struggling


The following is a message I sent a coworker, hoping to encourage. Feel free to copy and paste, modify, or use any part of it for someone you know who needs encouragement.


I saw you today and clearly you don’t want to talk about whatever it is you’re going through. It was painfully obvious you’re not OK. Know that I respect your privacy and am not fishing for any information from you. In fact, I do not need nor do I expect any response from you whatsoever. Feel free to completely disregard this message if it is not helpful to you.

More than likely you don’t even want to have to read something from someone else today. In no way do I intend to waste your time. So, thank you for at least reading my words this far into my note to you.

Please understand although this comes from me, it could easily be from a number of other people who think similarly about you but either don’t know you’re going through something, or don’t know how to put their thoughts together and get them to you. People tend to not want to bother others when they are going through stuff. Sometimes we get the impression it is best to leave others alone in times like these. Yet, we still want to let you know we care.

You never asked and I don’t intend to bother you by saying it, but I do pray for you. I pray for the people I care about. Today, I’ve prayed for you extra. If you ever need or want specific things prayed about, please let me know.

It appears you’re hurting, and you believe there’s nothing I can do to help. Hopefully, it helps, knowing I hurt with you. Seeing you hurt is hard, especially knowing I can’t help. If that changes and I can help, please let me know; or if someone else can help you with something, please let them know.

Whatever you’re going through, I hope you know it will pass. I’m not suggesting things will be easy. I don’t know what you’re going through. Still, I know time will pass and you can get through it. My experience is that hard times don’t last.

While you’re going through difficulties, know you’re not alone. People around you who care about you hurt when you hurt, and want to go through it with you — even if they never know what’s going on. Maybe it can take the edge off, knowing others are ready and willing to help or support you in your time of need, whether you use their help or not.

I thought about telling you how much you are a valuable part of “the team,” but I’m sure you know that. 

It seems more reasonable to tell you that you are a valuable part of my life. I am always glad to see you every time I see you. You brighten my day, and you make my world better. You’re helpful and optimistic, and you’ve even trusted me enough to tell me some of your personal life happenings. I’m honored we’ve been able to share things with each other. It’s good, building relationships like that. I think it strengthens us as individuals and as people who work together.

Know that even if others fail to tell you, you are respected, admired, appreciated, loved, valued, needed and noticed. Your family is blessed to have you in it. Our workplace is blessed to have you as a key player. I am blessed having you as a teammate and friend.

Hopefully, your days get better soon.

Sincerely, … 


Pastor Jeff Adams is a longtime community leader, victim advocate, counselor and chaplain. He ministers internationally, nationally and locally. His column appears online weekly and can be reached at


No comments on this item Please log in to comment by clicking here